Last fall, my eye doctor announced I was developing cataracts. I wasn't surprised particularly, I'm an old man and these things happened to old men, also they run in my family. The cataract surgeon had a look-see and told me to wait for a while. My reply? "Okie dokie." But the thing about "for a while" is eventually the while part runs out. Thus this afternoon found me back at the surgeon with my pupils dilated to the size of a couple of Death Stars scheduling my cataract surgery. Hot damn.
There was quite a few things I hadn't considered in the matter of getting my eyes chopped up. I had vaguely assumed things would just go back to pretty much the shitty level my eyes were at before the cataracts developed, but of course that's too simple. For one thing I am extremely nearsighted, for another, like most people as I got old, my eyes ability to adjust for reading or other close up focus crapped out so I was unable to see either far away or up close. Great. The surgery would correct not only the cataracts, but the myopia and the near focus as well. Or rather, it will correct EITHER the myopia OR the near focus. I had to pick one or the other. I'm pretty sure I went with continuing to wear glasses for distance, but not needing any correction when I'm fumbling my way through a menu. Since I have been wearing glasses for the last 60 years, the very idea of doing without was so inconceivable, I was flummoxed with the concept. I wanted to explain that I just need to be able to clearly see pictures of naked men, but the medical profession never seems to get with the program when it comes to porn.
Anyway, now I'm home, completely blinded by the dilation, huddled in my bedroom with the curtains drawn and the cats rampaging in the next room. I mentioned to Diane von Austinburg I'm worried that after the surgeries, I will finally have to see all the cat puke stains on my fancy rugs and I am not sure I am strong enough for that.
Speaking of naked men,
Because I am posting this while my eyes are so dialated they are mostly decorative, I will not have much to say about this week's boys.
I cannot see what I am putting up here very well, but I can make out that hog.
If some of these turn out to be kitties, I am not to blame.
I think I need some seeing-eye pussy.
I'm thinking Braille for butt.
