Sunday, January 8, 2012

Tick. Tock

I went to dinner tonight with our old friends Karen and Randy for some wonderfully tasty Italian food. Karen is the kind of charmer to whom everyone with a pulse is drawn; the hostess, bartenders, waiters , kitchen staff and owners were all fawning over her like she had been their prom date some magical long gone evening. It was very amusing and gratifying to trail along in her majestic wake.

It was also sweet of them to put up with me being late, again. I got ready plenty early, started reading and looking at the internet and pondering profound thoughts and suddenly the Late Fairy was working her magic.

It's always the same, I start out thinking "I'm going to need to go in a while" and suddenly switch over to "Fuck, fuck, fuck, I'm going to be late. Again." I seem to have some kind of chronological blind spot that allows the "Time to go" sweet spot to slide right past me. It was one of the few things that annoyed the ever sweet R Man. We wound up having plenty of discussions that involved the word "dawdling" as we were scrambling to get to whatever appointment I had made us late for. Again.

Alarms, schedules, nagging boyfriends: none of them work. It's like I see the time coming, fully prepared to get up and go, but at the neccessary point I am, instead, wondering about Barbie dolls or tacos or string theory or something and then, oops, late. Again.


  1. Welcome to my world Darling!
    I gave up wearing a wristwatch 20yrs ago...
    That's the good thing about friends... they love you for being you... Not for what time you show up to grace them with your presence...
    Besides I get so involved in surfing porn... er... I mean "researching"... I literally lose all track of time....

  2. I must take issue with you, Princess.

    My Friend "A" broke off a friendship with my Friend "B" because "B" was late ALL the time.

    The final straw, as I recall, was the day that "B" waltzed in 2 hours late for our lunch get-together.

  3. We all have internal clocks. Before the anti-depressants, I was punctual, even early. Afterwards? Fuck it, I'm CPT: Cookie's Personal Time.

    What I have done is move the clocks and watches ahead ten minutes. Yes, cognitivly I know that everything is the real time +ten, subconciously it does make you move faster.

    MJ - Two hours late for lunch? You know someone who waited two hours for another someone to show up? In my book if you are twenty minutes late, then we reschedule. Life is too short to "wait".

  4. fuck it, have lunch with the barbies.

  5. There's two sides to this issue as I suffer the same disorder. One is that you are perceived to be arrogant, in that nothing is going to happen until you get there. The other and the one I favor is procrastination, a form of intuition or omen. The mind will determine the appropriate time for departure. I can cite numerous occasions of my own salvation but once I had company on a schedule saying, "We should leave" and I delayed them for twenty minutes out of pure selfishness. They phoned up later saying there had been a disastrous pile-up on the highway and would been involved had they left as planned.

    Tardiness has advantages.

  6. It certainly seems to have plenty of company.

  7. I'm the complete opposite... habitually on time. I inherited it from my father. Growing up, we were the first family everywhere.

  8. I have a friend who often runs late -- so I compensate by telling him to meet me wherever about a half-hour before I'll really be there. The result? I'm there on time, he's there about five minutes early.

    He knows I do this to him. He knows his wife and other friends do this to him also. He falls for it every time!

  9. Time is only an illusion. Late and early are always relative. I've been drinking.


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