Friday, April 18, 2025

In Which We Are Sick as a Sick Dog

 

So, mrpeenee, what adorable souvenir did you bring back from your trip to London and Paris?  Two of them actually: a bookmark from Air France and a bad head cold from London.  The very nice flight attendant in our cabin gave the little bookmark to Diane and she gave it to me; I don't know why I didn't get one directly, maybe I just don't look literate.  I can see how that could happen.  Coincidentally, R Man and I used to collect bookmarks on our travels.  They're easy to transport, and the gift shops in museums would often have very cool ones as a memento. We wound up with several leather ones or fancy graphics ones and I still have the world's largest collection of them in private hands.

The collection, in situ, marked and ready to rock

As for the cold, I suspect it got an early foothold from the vent in my hotel room in London blowing directly into my face.  Then, not one, but two days stuck in the massive petri dish that is Heathrow Airport just sealed the deal.  When I finally tottered back into my apartment on Thursday evening, I felt pretty knackered, but I thought that was just the traveling catching up with me.  By Saturday, I threw in the towel and admitted I was sick.  I have spent the week since then dealing with every symptom you can conceive of.  The volume and range of excrescence my body is generating has been genuinely impressive and my coughing has become less of a symptom and more a way of life now. 

Whenever I'm sick, my voice drops several octaves.  My timbre these days is very similar to that of the fine American actress Miss Kathleen Turner, if Kathleen Turner were in the last stages of the Black Death.  I'm not even convinced my voice is audible to humans anymore, it probably just shows up on some Richter scale reading somewhere.

The cats remain very attentive, I think they can sense there is something wrong with me, more so even than usual.  Although I suppose it's possible they're just trying to get first dibs on eating my corpse.  I'm feeling better today, but just remember if they find my cat mangled dead body, I request a non-denominational funeral at sea with a military band playing the classic "Funkytown." 

Guys who could make me feel better:

Asstastic


Snuglly.  I looked up that spelling twice and I am still not convinced of it.



Cheese it, the cops.


Gotta love them gingers.


Getting this post up used up all my energy allotment for the day, I'm going back to bed.


15 comments:

  1. Yes that jock is ASStastic, a callipygic delighter !
    -CA jock

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A butt like that could raise the dead; how appropriate for Easter.

      Delete
  2. Feel better soon, Mr. P! (That ginger boy looks verrry tasty!)

    Anonymous, too

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks sweetie, I'm pretty sure I'm on the mend

      Delete
  3. Get well soon! Love that ginger!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Get better soon! Heathrow sounds horrible.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think all airports are some kind of ring of hell

      Delete
  5. Hope you are on the mend soon. Maybe you won’t go to Paris next April. We’ll see.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am never leaving home again. They'll have to remove me from San Francisco in an urn.

      Delete
  6. Catching something's always the "catch" when it comes to travel. I just finished a trek back East to clean out Mum's place, then DROVE tons of Mum's crap back to Minnesota. When you're literally on the road, humanity, and I do mean humanity is everywhere. Every time I walked into a rest stop/whatever along 90 I figured I catch something. Then there was that shithole in Buffalo I spent the night in. Amazingly I got home unscathed. Feel better real soon, and DRINK! Flush it out!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I've yet to come across an airport I like, there are no better than holding pens for cattle. The French natives have some strange ways, for example squat down toilets, its not natural and they eat funny food. Saying that so do the English I once took a 6am flight and the departure lounge bar was crammed full with drinkers, not just the usual scrobnobs but respectable looking old ladies nursing G&Ts yes, my mother and her friend Jean.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that sounds unbearably grim. Probably why you all were pouring them down your necks.

      Delete

In Which We Survive

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.