Friday, September 14, 2007

Wardrobe Malfunction


I am wearing today the outfit I always wear. A t-shirt, jeans with no embarrassingly obvious stains and converse tennis shoes. I realize this is the same fashion choice I have been making pretty much daily since I stopped wearing diapers. (Please, no cracks from the peanut gallery about when that was. You know perfectly well what I mean. Bitches.) I’m just glad I belong to a generation and a city where professional, responsible adults can get away with looking like their job description includes the phrase “Delivers newspapers in timely fashion.” Occasionally, and under duress, I have to dress like a real grownup. A beautiful black DKNY suit, a heavily laundered white shirt, and one of the many dazzling ties R Man buys me each Christmas and I look like a new man. It’s no more authentic than when I did drag for Southern Decadence in New Orleans by slipping into a black lace Merry Widow and t-strap pumps, it just lets me fit in better with the bankers from Wells Fargo. Of course, some of them would be very impressed with a sassy little Merry Widow, and jealous, to boot, but that's another story.

2 comments:

  1. I wish I could dress as casually.

    I have to wear a tie and dress clothes to trudge through the mud each day.
    ugh

    Lord help your ass if you don't wear panty hose or a tie...

    maybe I'll try both.

    And of course you could always wear that flirty merry widow under your t-shirt....
    Victoria's little secret indeed.

    ReplyDelete
  2. A tie? They have you teaching in what sounds like a bad remake of God's Little Acre and you have to wear a tie? Outrageous!

    I suppose it's better than pantyhose.

    ReplyDelete

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