Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Room and Bored

Quel tragique, my little schnauzers. The fabulous new sofa we had snagged last week at Room and Board was delivered to day. Or was attempted to be delivered. As much as it longed to be held in our loving arms, it wouldn't fit up the stairs, even though the store previously had sent out a special Fit Team to measure and see if it would. The verdict: Too Damn Big, which I've heard plenty of times before, but never so bitterly.

So I just marched my little self back down there, dusted myself and started all over again. A terribly sweet matronly saleslady (side note: how sad it is to realize all these motherly types are my contemporaries. Laugh now, bitches, your day will come.) In trying to help us find a couch that was similar in sleek lines, long enough for us to lie on, but short enough to fit up the damn stairs, she led us back to the first couch I had fallen in lust with: a beauty in velvet, the epitome of Hollywood Regency glamour, a chaise with lines so taut they look like they were cut with an Xacto blade. It seemed the universe was having one cruel jest on me after another as I explained I would love to consider it, but it didn't come in the ivory velvet we wanted.

Turns out the Mommie saleslady is also our Fairy Godmother since she firmly contradicted me, went over to the swatch cabinet and yanked out the most luscious cream velvet you could ask for. Why the minion last week couldn't find it is beyond me, but there it was and I am not arguing.

And now I have the couch I truly wanted in the first place. Life is so sweet. Feast your eyes, my dears, on our new glam fest (you have to imagine it in ivory). If only the fucker fits.

14 comments:

  1. it is simply divine. practice feigning unconciousness, so when it arrives you can be the first to swoon on it.

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  2. Count on it darling. I have my hand pressed to my brow right this very second.

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  3. It's perfect for those daily fainting spells!

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  4. Translation of comment #3...

    Cat fur magnet.

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  5. Very Moderne, very classic, very sleek, very sexy... very you!
    MR.Peenee in repose on the piece will be something to see.

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  6. God works in mysterious ways. When it comes to this type of purchase I always find the older, long term emplyees - thy know how to make things happen when they otherwise younger by the book types can't.

    Did you also get it fitted for clear plastic slip covers? Because that that cream velvet every fleck of protoplasm, hair hair of the cat, and every leaky wet fart is going to show.

    And I only bring this up because I don't want you hitting the nerve tonic everytime a Jehovah's Witness comes to call, or when R Man takes you to the couch and "takes" you there as well.

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  7. Loved the first one, but LOOOVVE this one! Couldn't be happier. Will make a bee line to the Bay Area for my next case of the vapors.

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  8. Simply divine! Simply NOT for Miss J's house where her monster dogs have lately decided their dog beds will not do- its the couch, the over-stuffed chair or nothing. Counting the days until the dog enclosure is erected...

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  9. I love it so much it brought tears to my eyes.

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  10. Divine!

    Ivory Velvet?
    I think I might just ask to be called that hence forth.

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  11. How utterly fabulous! And you deserve nothing less.

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  12. That is one lovely sofa. So glad you got the one of your dreams!

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  13. Room & Board has the very best selection but seriously hellish delivery times. Don't they understand that the sofa is the anchor to the whole room? I mean please, 12 weeks?

    I suppose I could be patient-but run against type- nope I don't think so.

    I love the new selection-it is stunning!

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