Friday, March 7, 2008

The first of many

Jason over on the Night is Half Gone blog is feeling reminiscent tonight about his first date. It reminds me of my first time, a guy whose face I've forgotten, from 32 years ago. He snagged me at the end of my shift on the front desk of a motel in Austin. He was staying in the hotel with his wife and kids while in town for her father's funeral. He wore too much English Leather and came in my mouth. I was astonished. I still remember his name: Nick Coffee. Mr. Coffee.

Later, as I was driving home, I remember thinking "I guess I'm gay." It wasn't horrifying or exhilirating; it was more like finally figuring out something I couldn't quite grasp before, like finally coming up with a song lyric I had been having trouble remembering. "Oh. Suck dick equal gay. I get it."

8 comments:

  1. you just outed him!!!!!

    now i will google his family and look em up

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  2. I love this thread. I remember riding my bike home from the dirty book store with my purchase of Mandate magazine when I was fourteen. Yes I said bike! I got home, beat off and later read an article and thought to myself, “I’m gay.” Like you said it wasn’t horrifying or exhilarating it was more like finally figuring something out. What took me so long?

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  3. Mr. Coffee?
    (Good heavens the bad jokes I must restrain myself from making.)

    But your:
    "It wasn't horrifying or exhilirating; it was more like finally figuring out something I couldn't quite grasp before, like finally coming up with a song lyric I had been having trouble remembering."

    is pretty profound.

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  4. There. I'm profound AND sleazy. I knew it.

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  5. My past is so traumatic that I dare not look back, lest I turn to a pillar of salt. And pepper.

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  6. Did you wake up and smell the coffee?

    Or did you gargle before going to bed?

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  7. thank you TOA for asking what I tried not to ask.

    Oh, and was it good to the last drop.

    (sorry)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm pretty sure I went home and washed it all down with tequila since that was what I was doing pretty much every night at the time.

    ReplyDelete

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