Saturday, September 15, 2007

Coach Says Time Out

I went to the baths in Berkeley last night and had a lovely time, thanks. Gaggles of humpy, short men (a sexual weakness of mine) who seemed very glad to see me, oh boy. Short men have such beautiful round muscles and they just seem to fit better. Years and years of experience have proven to me there is a world of men out there who get all heated up by the phenotype I fall in, which can only be described as lanky, and certainly, I'm grateful for them. I like being tall, but tall, skinny men leave me cold.

My only cavil about this tub trip was the one who adressed me as "Coach," as in "Fuck my pussy, coach." This is the third or fourth time over these many years of sexing it up with the boys that someone has called me that and it always baffles me. I should mention I bear a strong resemblance to Miss Jane on the Beverly Hillbillies, even naked. Maybe especially naked. So having them peg me as "coach" just makes me wonder what wierd little movie they have running in their head. The only coaching I could see me doing would be of a mediocre girl's volleyball team and if that's what they're fantasizing about while I'm busy plugging them, well, I call that ungrateful.

I also say ewww. A naked Nancy Kulp spiking a return back over the net. Ewww.


  1. Woo hoo for the short ones. I fall into the tall, not exactly lanky and love the under 5'9" set, but not to much closer to the ground. I can't say I've ever been called coach. My favorite shout out, though sadly mainly at the garage or taco stand not the bedroom, is a compact Latino dude calling me "Boss" with a lot of swagger as he looks up at me to let me know who really is in charge. Gets me every time. Check your fluids? Hot or mild sauce with that?

  2. But imagine Nancy's manly voice cooing into one's ear?

  3. I think I'd rather have it off with Mr. Drysdale.

    and junk thief reminds me that I want tacos for lunch. La Corneta, here I come.

  4. A great thing about shorter guys is that it's easier to reach everything at the same time!

    I remember the first (and ONLY, thank you!) time a guy called me "Daddy" during sex. It made me pause briefly before I slapped him.

  5. At only 5'4" I fall into the short guy category of which you speak, but this talk of 'muscles' leaves me baffled. I should get some of those one day.

    We are indeed a rare gem to some, although my experience in the past with some tall guys has been that they expect smaller guys to be passive, or play some of sort 'son' role. Eh, screw that - I like to bang a hot butt as much as the next guy. They might just need to scooch down for me to reach...

  6. thombeau, sweetie, somone adressing you as "daddy" probably wants to be slapped, you simply fell into his diabolical scheme.

    And TOA, oooh, a knitting banger, sounds hot. As Junk Thief says, "woo hoo."

  7. Isnt "banger" slang for sausage down there?

    ...a knitting sausage. I'd pay to see that.


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