Thursday, January 10, 2008

CSI Salad Bar


The Scene: A crowded salad bar downtown on a wet Thursday lunch hour

The Perp: A stodgy "person" of indeterminate sex

The Crime: Holding up the whole goddam line by inspecting each spinach leaf, every individual pea, every solitary carrot slice before making a choice. Forcing a respectable middle aged civil servant to refrain from screaming "It's a piece of broccoli, not a religious conviction. Move it." Aggravated aggravation.

The Verdict: Justifiable homicide.

10 comments:

  1. um, people arent supposed to eat from those salad bars...ewwhhhh

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  2. They make you puffy, THEY DO, THEY DO I TELL YOU, THEY DO.

    That was acting, thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "It's a piece of broccoli, not a religious conviction."

    oh, that killed me, mrpeenee!

    i think you should be charged with disturbing the peace by causing a riot.

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  4. I, personally, would have paid $$$ to see you NOT refrain. Salad Bar Smack down!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh snap, I think you and I are officially having our periods on the same day now.

    ReplyDelete
  6. e-
    Only if you were there to get my back in case the smack down went wrong.

    toa-
    it was inevitable.

    ReplyDelete
  7. YES! BRENDA! I love you a little more for quoting that. She had a christmas party recently- you must see the video.

    "I'm a saucy boozehound. Yes, my ladyhamper is dirty!"

    ReplyDelete
  8. darling, I might have known you would recognize the Dickson. And my favorite line in the whole Christmas spectacular is "My lady hamper..." I mutter it under my breath in dull meetings from time to time.

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  9. Is that his/her/its remains there in the center?
    I do hope so.

    ReplyDelete
  10. The does sort of look like him/her/it. How very perceptive of you.

    ReplyDelete

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